July 18th, 2016

CIA Welcomes Incoming Class of PokéChefs

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Pokemon Anton Plaza

HYDE PARK, NY

The Culinary Institute of America has always been known for staying ahead of the curve when it comes to the education of its students. This past Monday was no exception. In a monumental decision made by the administration, the first class of Pokémon began their culinary dreams at the historic school’s New York campus. In their newly issued chef whites, all could feel the excitement buzzing in the air.

“I’m so very excited to begin my career as a chef,” remarked Pidgey, in her newly donned toque. “Being a first-generation college student is a big deal to my family and me. I mean, there has to be more to life than Razzberries, right?” While the CIA’s abundance of Razzberries is overflowing in the storage room, Pidgey will find far more than that in her product knowledge class. In fact, when I explained the concept of a blueberry, she nearly fainted!

Another student, Gastly, came to the CIA for different reasons. “I’m here for the culinary science major,” he says. “Whenever I’m sick, people just kept giving me potion after potion after potion, and the reality is…they just don’t taste good! I want to change the dynamic of that—tablets, chewable, nasal spray. And we need to get some decent flavors too! Could you imagine a piña colada chewable? I’d be the healthiest guy around.”

Speaking of staying healthy, the CIA has worked tirelessly to ensure the overall health of their PokéChefs. Above the iconic fountain on Anton Plaza sits a glorious, state-of-the-art Gym for their new students. Complete with an arena to practice battling, a pathway right to the Hudson River for the water-type Pokémon, and an aerial obstacle course, there are plenty of extracurricular activities for them to take part in. “This gym is incredible,” remarked Geodude between reps. “My Rock Throw has never felt stronger.”

Due to the active academic and social schedule, Pokémon are likely to tire. To further meet the needs of the students, the Health Services area has been revamped to accommodate all potential injuries that occur. “We have plenty of space for all of our students,” said newly hired staff member, Nurse Joy. “Big or small, we’ve got you covered.” Based on the number of sleeping Snorlax in the newly installed PokéBeds and the extended storage for potions, there’s no better place to be a Pokémon!

By Dylan Parkin